Every time I think I’m getting a handle on things, “life” shows up, laughs in my face, and shows me I still have a lot to learn. This week is a good example of that.
As I mentioned in my last post, this week was filled with opportunities. And it started off great. My first meeting, on Monday afternoon, was productive and successful. It was the meeting with faculty members at Avery’s school to discuss Usborne Books & More. I received great feedback, and it looks like there are definite possibilities there. I also presented one of our fundraising programs, Cards for a Cause, at the PTO meeting on Thursday afternoon. And, while there weren’t a lot of people there, I got positive feedback there, too, and another bit of hope that this ESR thing might pan out.
That was probably the only area of my life that was successful this week.
My meeting with the Friends of the Library on Wednesday night was postponed, due to the forecasted weather (though it could have definitely been held, since it didn’t even start to flurry until a half hour before the meeting was scheduled to start). My vendor event on Friday was not very successful, despite previous events at the same location that were successful. Of course I may have been a little “off” too, since I had Emily with me. And my author event on Saturday: while I enjoyed talking to other authors and a few readers, attendance was low (it was their first year), and I didn’t make much by way of sales.
That was business this week. That doesn’t touch on the personal stuff. Avery’s behavior has been a challenge, with not listening and attitude and talking back. My grandmother is in the hospital again and not doing well, though she seems to be hanging on (this is why Emily was with me at my vendor event. My mom, my usual babysitter, was at the hospital with my grandmother). And, of course, being crazy busy with business stuff is all fine and dandy — but you don’t want to see my kitchen or laundry piles. Plus, being busy has left me more tired than usual, which means I’m a bit crankier than usual — which leaves me with little patience to deal with Avery and little motivation to tackle the cleaning.
All in all, I’d say it was a very educational week. I learned a lot about what I can and cannot do, and where I need to tweak my routines and priorities. At this point I have a few options:
- Take a deep breath, evaluate the week in depth, and see where I can make adjustments to make it all work. Stay positive.
- Take a deep breath, evaluate the week in depth, and forget about some things that didn’t work so I can focus on the areas with the most potential.
- Shift focus this week, put business stuff on a back burner, and tackle personal life stuff. Deal with the business stuff in dribs and drabs when I feel so inclined.
- Curl in the fetal position and ignore all my responsibilities until I have to drop off Avery for school tomorrow morning.
I think anyone who knows me could tell you that any variation of option 4 is completely out of the question. Since when I have been one to run and hide? So that leaves the other 3, and, to be honest, I’ll probably be combining all 3 in some way to get the most bang for my buck. (But let’s be honest — it will probably be mostly option 1. I am determined to have it all, after all.)
I have already made some decisions. For example I have determined that the way I had my weekly routine/schedule wasn’t working for me. While most of it was fine, trying to pigeonhole certain tasks into specific project times wasn’t working. Why? More urgent tasks kept coming up, needing to be done first, which meant that my regularly-scheduled projects were getting pushed. This week, with its long list of pressing tasks, was a prime example of this. So I need to find some way to account for that.
I also need to find time to read the books I keep borrowing from the library. While reading may be considered unnecessary and a relaxation tool, these books were borrowed for specific reasons, usually to help with Avery’s behavior. If I don’t read them, I can never implement the ideas and see if they’ll help. And his behavior certainly isn’t improving on its own. I’m tired of getting frustrated and irritated when I know I could be learning and helping.
With regards to the rest of it? Well, I’m still figuring it all out. But I’ll be sure to keep you posted! Maybe by this time next week I’ll have a better handle on it all. Stay tuned!