Putting Myself First

I find myself floundering a bit lately, struggling with sticking to my plans. I’ve been tired, which doesn’t help, but even when I head to bed early it seems even that plan doesn’t work — the kids or my bladder end up waking me up during the night, so I don’t get a full night’s sleep. I’m still being productive, but it’s with more computer-related, passive tasks. My cleaning project seems to be stuck on hold, as I just don’t have the energy or motivation to get much done. And that’s not good news for my goals!

So what’s a girl to do? I’ve already made some adjustments in my planner. I’ve attempted to get more rest, to no avail. I make half-hearted attempts at pushing myself, but I don’t seem to get anywhere. The only times I’m interested in cleaning are when I’m at work or busy doing other things. During my actual free time I find I’m drawn toward other activities.

This has happened before. It happens periodically. And the best way to break the cycle is usually to grab hold of even the slightest bit of motivation and push myself to be active. The less I do, the less I want to do — I’m pretty that’s the same for everyone. So if I let myself get away with not cleaning, I’m not going to want to clean. But if I start getting back into the routine, then I’m more motivated overall. It’s a solid strategy that has worked in the past. Still, I think this time around more is going on.

I have a feeling that at least part of the reason this has happened now is that I haven’t been taking care of myself very well physically. Yes, I’ve pushed myself to get a lot done, resulting in fatigue, but that’s not the problem. The problem is a poor diet, lack of exercise, and low water levels. I’ve been eating too much sugar, drinking too little water, and the exercise plan I set for myself months ago has long since fallen by the wayside, a byproduct of a messy house; I need to clear out space in the basement (a big part of my cleaning project) so I have actual room to exercise.

So here’s the plan: grab hold of any motivation I can get, get cleaning again (with the focus on the basement to start), begin again on my exercise plan, and cut back on the snacks (and work on portion control — I know I’ve been eating too much overall at meals). I also need to start using my water jug again so I drink more water.

The good news is that this plan doesn’t really require more work. The cleaning was already planned, and, technically, the exercise plan was already written down in my planner, too (it just wasn’t getting checked off). Snacking, portion control, and water consumption are a mental adjustment, not a schedule adjustment, so they won’t take up any more time than eating and drinking usually do. If I can get myself in the right mindset, things should just fall into place.

It’s easy to get wrapped up in work, the to do list, the many projects I have planned. But, obviously, if I don’t take care of my body, the rest just falls apart. Sometimes I just need to put myself first. Maybe it’s time to add that to the to do list.

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